STREAMING MADNESS: SPOTIFY’S “POP REMIX PLAYLIST”
I HAD NO IDEA DAVID GUETTA AND BEBE REXHA DID AN INTERPOLATION OF “I’M BLUE” BY EIFFEL 65
Streaming Madness is a new feature here at John’s Music Blog. I’m going to punish myself and jump into whatever streaming playlist I find exciting for whatever demented reason. Why am I blogging? What does it all mean? Welcome to Streaming Madness. Today: Pop Remix Hell.
Britney Spears and Elton John “Hold Me Closer (Joel Corry Remix)”
I have been hearing the “original'' version of this song in diners and Dunkin’s for months. Until now I had no idea Britney Spears was involved. It’s a deranged sort of medley of Elton John songs and maybe a low point in contemporary pop music, though I do like the way the autotune sounds when they go high in the post. The remix doesn’t do much.
Sam Smith (Featuring Kim Petras) “Unholy (Disclosure Remix)”
As with most of these songs, I had to listen to the original in order to judge the remix. The original has some hyperpop leaning production and the kind of chorus that I can only imagine will end up soundtracking the trailer for an HBOMax original. The remix is the kind of dependable middlebrow Disclosure can be counted on for. It’s probably the most “tasteful” music on this playlist, for whatever that’s worth. Low bar–the wrong bar.
Ava Max “Million Dollar Baby (TELYKast Remix)”
The original is surging synth pop one or two clicks above the interstitial music on “Selling Sunset.” What does it say that I keep describing music in relation to other streaming content? Sort of hard not to. Anyways: this song was probably written for Lady Gaga. The remix roughly adheres to the kind of circuit anthem formula perfected by Thunderpuss in the late 1990s.
David Guetta and Bebe Rexha “I’m Good (Blue) (Gabry Ponte Remix)”
I mean, how do you really judge this? It’s David Guetta and Bebe Rexha interpolating “I’m Blue” by Eiffel 65. The small part of me that is still wearing ZUBAZ under ripped jeans paired with a neon windbreaker would call it sick and call it a day. I respect that they tapped an actual member of Eiffel 65 for the remix. Might’ve been in the contract.
James Hype and Miggy Dela Rosa “Ferrari (Oliver Heldens Remix)”
Because the number five spot on this playlist was just the original version of “I’m Good (Blue),” I’m going to skip to number six. The original is poppy tech house that samples a Diddy classic. The remix pushes things into an even more generic festival type space. I don’t really know what to say here. These songs are all pretty boring, though I doubt they are any more or less boring than a good portion of “credible” dance music. At least the Guetta song is interesting enough to hate.